Falling Out of the “In Crowd”

So how do Female Powerhouses fall out of favor? Out of the “In Crowd”?

My last post “Female Power and the In Crowd” discussed what it takes to be a female insider, part of the promotable “In Crowd”. As everyone knows, things can change, and sometimes not for the better.

Lydia was “on her way up” (not her real name). She had been identified by the HR practices as someone promotable. Lydia was promoted to a very visible position. This young woman was very, very ambitious. Lydia had a nasty streak that she hid from her betters. Their experience of her was different than the people who worked for her. No one dared to complain. Then Lydia did something that management didn’t like; she went too far. Lydia fell from grace.

Beyond the obvious Female career No-No’s (topic of a future post!) here are some of the things I’ve seen derail even savvy careerists:

• GOING TOO FAR: They push or force opportunities, going “too far”, not realizing the limits of their power, continually stressing their support structure. They misuse their power for personal satisfaction. Eventually, they make a really outrageous mistake. This causes their support structure to crumble, because it gets “too hot”.
• EXPERTISE FAILS AND THEY OVERCOMPENSATE: They forget to learn. They try to lead by direction in areas where their expertise is weak. Micromanagement or disinterested leadership can cause problems, and things can get ugly if either perfection is required or something is delivered that is seriously “off-mark”.
• IMPACT OF STRESS: The easy nature of their normal interactions becomes stressed for some reason. This can be caused by work stress, or home stress, or illness. When you are a leader, there is only so much stress induced behavior that is going to be accepted.
• THE MASK DROPS: They forget to be well-intentioned because they aren’t. Problems arise they are too busy to solve quickly, so problems fester. Their behavior becomes sarcastic or worse yet, the mask drops around their subordinates and they are a bully. Worse yet, they may try to bully other peers or even their leadership. They forget to be honest and eventually this catches up with them.

AS A RESULT, THEIR SUPPORT NETWORK BACKS AWAY. Any of the above problems BY ITSELF might be enough to cause respect to be lost. Then it’s harder to get critical support needed when problems arise.

Without critical support they find themselves out of the In Crowd.

I’m not sure how it works for men; I think it’s different to a degree. The In Crowd usually just has one woman in it, or maybe two, at each level in the organizations I’ve been in, beyond early to mid-career. That could just be my age though, or just the industries I’ve been in.

So what to do? THAT is the topic of my next post! Stay tuned!

What do you think? Let us hear from you!